Wearwolf

So I was right.. it has been around full moon these last few days which more than explains my brazen behaviour.

Loco also got his mojo back so everything is hunky dory.

Ireland is in town - I still haven't told Loco - I am contemplating going for lunch with ireland and telling Loco about it afterwards.

Agh! On one hand I want to see him, he's my friend and I haven't seend him for a good year and a half, on the other hand I don't want Loco to be mad at me (even thought it's unreasonable for him to sulk he still will)

What to do...

Filth

I think it must be full moon or something. All I can think about is tearing off Loco’s clothes… not that I seem to be getting anywhere, he just isn’t really interested. Last night my attempts to lure him to bed early failed abysmally.

Yeh so he injured his leg running and can hardly walk, meh… What man turns down lovin’? My one. Darn.

Today I packed him off to work laden with anti inflammatories and other drugs in the hope that his damn leg stops hurting him and I can get some action.

Other than that everything is grrrrrreat :) I can’t wait for our holiday and he makes me so happy :)

What a bundle of joy I am today :) lalala lala

We're all going on a (late) summer holiday

Yippee! I’ve finally booked my holiday! My thoughts of a week in the Caribbean suddenly became non-existent as hurricane Dean rolled in this week but still after hours of trawling through holiday sites on the internet we've finally chosen the destination (By “we” I mean to say “mainly I” and by “mainly I”, I mean, well, “just I with a little help from Loco’s credit card”. When it comes to decision making he is about as useful as a soggy tissue. So, en fin, I have chosen the destination, dates, flights, hotel and am currently preparing our itinerary – all very exhausting)
Although I think we’re gonna have a great time. Coercing Loco into it is sure to be worth it.

Obviously I would love to give you all the details but I wouldn’t want any of those crazy blog stalkers following me but still, here are a few clues:

My highlight of the trip will be spotting some whales (no, not myself in the mirror) (I hope)
I will be taking my waterproof jacket and umbrella but also my bikini
I will be visiting an island

Hmm, these are all the clues I can think of without giving away my destination.

Any guesses?

If I think of some more I’ll keep you posted.

I am very excited :)

The perils of the internet

I have been very naughty.

I have always been aware of the wonders of Internet shopping but rare is the occasion when I allow myself to indulge.

Until now.

I was getting kind of tired of the same old Mango, Zara etc stuff that you find on your local Spanish high street so I thought I would have a gander at www.asos.com. This was my first big mistake. My gander soon turned into a couple of hundred euros worth of clothing winging its way to my office. I wanted it to arrive before my holiday so I could take it with me. And it did, the Friday I was due to leave.

My big plan was to take the clothes little by little home and sneak them into the suitcase. By Thursday they still hadn't arrived so I had to think of a new plan. As I would be leaving for the airport directly from work, I would just pop the stuff in my suitcase on Friday morning. Easy peasy. Easy, that is, until Loco decided that he would park his car near work and have his dad collect the car later, thereby avoiding the problem of taking big heavy suitcases on public transport. Damn damn damn.

My package arrived on Friday morning and it was like Christmas day, only that i knew what my presents were and I paid for them myself, but it was still a bit like Christmas day opening the box and pulling out top after top after jeans after jumper. Happy days.

But how was I to get all the stuff secretly into the suitcase? Thank god for fashion. I am talking about big handbags. I rationaled with myself and decided that the jeans and jumper probably wouldn't be necessary in Andalucia so they stayed behind locked up in my drawer.. and the rest? Flimsy fabrics folded up nice and small wrapped up in my scarf (yes scarf - the air con is v.v. cold in the office) and stuffed at the bottom of my handbag. Genius!

I thought I was home dry until we went through airport security. As I watched my bag get put through the x-ray machine for a second time my palms started to sweat at the thought of Loco finding out about my little shopping spree. I had packed a little case of jewellery and it was showing up strangely on the x-ray machine.

"Miss, could I ask you to open your bag"

AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

"There's something strange showing up along the left hand side"

"It's just my earrings " I said foraging for the jewellery case praying I wouldn't be asked to empty the contents of my bag

A closer inspection of the jewellery case by security and I was away without any further problems. Phew.

My next mission - to wear the clothes without Loco noticing they were new .

I shouldn't have worried, he didn't bat an eyelid as I tried on garment after garment, not even querying that he hadn't seen them before. Boys, sigh. Although I guess I should count my lucky stars.

have I learnt my lesson. No. I'm already browsing the new asos collection and as play.com packages arrive at my desk, I wonder - how will I get all these books home?

Ayyy

I’m really getting bad at this whole blogging thing! Call me lazy.

I’ve just been away for a few days to Andalucia to soak up some rays and try to get some kind of a tan… This is a place where I have spent summers year in year out for the last 25 years and it’s always hot, hot, hot. Mid August can usually expect temperatures of around 35-40ºc in the daytime and a little less at night but you can forget the sheets and blankets.

This year it was cold. 22ºC cold. I wore a scarf – I kid you not. Although I enjoyed chomping on the local pescaito frito and other delicious seafood, I did not enjoy sitting outside on a terrace freezing my bits off. Even in the daytime with the sun beating down, the wind was so chilly that rather than lie on my towel, I lay under it.

I have another week of holiday due in September and I am still trying to decide where to go and what to do. I think I’ve ruled out the Caribbean for hurricane related motives and will probably settle for somewhere closer to home – I wonder what Bulgaria is like.

In other news, Ireland, yes that old chestnut, is coming over for another visit at the end of August. I think I should see him this time and I will have to put my foot down with Loco, after all it’s been nearly 2 years since I last saw him and nothing is going to happen. Curiously the night before I heard from Ireland, and I rarely hear from him at all these days, I had a dream about him.. spooky eh!

I have refrained from telling Loco for now as I don’t want all the stress before Ireland arrives – I think I’ll inform him on the day or the day before – meaning only one stressful day. Besides he speaks to his ex all the time – a little give and take is in order me thinketh.

The Pob

So after my extremely short visit of 48 hours, 4 of which were spent at the hairdresser I am now back sporting a very blond POB which although quite Victoria Beckham-esque, actually looks quite good and I would be very delighted with my brand new look if only Loco's sister in law hadn't gone and got the EXACT SAME CUT. AGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGH.

Snivvle snivvle

She had hers done on Wednesday but I hadn't seen her so I wasn't aware but she is now bound to think that I heard about it and copied.


PS: I would like to point out that I didn't ask for a POB. I tell my stylist she has free reign such is the trust I have in her ability. She chops and colours and I wait for the end result. And I would like to add that she has been eager to POB me since before VB even had a POB. so there. I am NOT a VB wannabe.

bad hair day

I’m back to UK this weekend where I shall be making a long overdue visit to the hairdresser. After two and a half years I still haven’t got over my fear of Spanish hairdressers and will only go to my tried and tested salon in England. This is despite the fact that it has been a good 4 months between visits, despite the fact I live next door to a salon and despite the fact that it is the Suegra’s salon.

I have got as far as letting Suegra dry my hair, and she does it very nicely, but cut, no, no cutting and highlights, no way josé. I did once allow myself to be persuaded into visiting the salon to get my roots done… but never again. I tried to explain how they do it in England, (lots of foils, different colours, tiny bits of hair, natural look). That much was understood –

“but how do they do your roots?”
“like I just told you” I explain
“but they must do the roots another way”
“no! like I told you – the foils etc etc”
“hmm but you can’t do roots with foils.. but, well, we can try”

So they tried, two hours later and lo and behold the roots look the same i.e. dark, they tell me there is no way that the roots can be done that way and they must have been painted with a brush. I sigh and vow never to go back much to the disappointment of suegra.

So here I am with scraggly, root showing hair wondering if there are any decent hairdressers in Spain that won’t make you look like a badger or any other striped animal.

I definitely don’t think I’ll be visiting Suegra’s beauty salon…

Huss-y, what can the matter be?

So it's been a while… like I said, I have a new job, so I've been sussing out how much internet access I have. Not enough to listen to Pandora radio, but enough to sustain my facebook addiction.

Haven't tried blogging though. Don't want to get fired before my one month trial period is up.

Obviously as we all know it's against blogging "rules" to talk about your job etc etc so I'll tell you this much – it's good, I like it so far, they don't give me enough work yet so I get a bit bored and the people seem ok. There are only 2 people in the whole office that I have taken a particular dislike to.. put it this way, the other day I watched the Wizard of Oz a and when the wicked witch on the bike flew by, I thought it was my but I'll tell you about that another time. Oh and I think I work with beardman's brother… the gay version.

Loco is fine too, we are no nearer moving or renovating L still living with the suegros but I can't complain other than having gained 4kg from suegra food. EEK.

We're currently trying to decide where to go on holiday.. I quite fancy the Caribbean again. Maybe Mexico this time, although I did see a good deal for Gambia – I wonder what that's like??

Google Keywords

Everyone has a post on this time to time don't they!

Here are my favourites of the season:

Wildsex with pickle
Hairy Argentian

and to finish

Glory hole with erectile disfunction


Least I don't have no scary stalkers though :)

Cash out of hand

Although I cancelled my gym membership in March, the gym have decided to continue charging me a monthly fee throughout April, May and June despite my efforts to stop them.

Yesterday I'd had quite about enough of that and so decided to tootle off to the bank to cancel my direct debit where I learnt an amazing thing...

If you ask to return the debit within 15 days of being charged it they pop the money right back into your account. Woohoo, 73€ better off..

However this does not account for the other 146€ Euros I am owed and very much need to cover some part of the extortinate cost of the entire Christian Dior skincare range I bought myself last night. Naughty naughty.

I tried to get away with this without Loco finding out as I should be trying to limit my expenditure for the rest of the month after weekend of extravagance but he walked right in just as the assistant was totting up the price.

"Don't tell me the cost, just charge the card" I hissed at her waving my new visa frantically in her face.

But alas, it was too late, Loco had already seen the cash till display. Damn that fancy technology.

The assistant did give me some samples for him to help soften the blow.. which did help a little.. but only until he opened the mobile phone bill.. Eek.

* a curious fact about banks in Spain is that they don't appear to have any security barriers - Just a desk where you stroll up to to deposit or withdraw cash - no glass screens - no little semi circular hole where your hand can get stuck as you scrabble about for the notes - no little holes that you have to shout your business through to make yourself heard, Hell I could walk around and pat the cashier on the head if I so fancied. No wonder then that this bank robber is so successful round these parts

Greed and Gluttony

I'm back! Had a very nice weekend in fancy hotel overlooking beach and now a little bit pinkish from the sun.

I definitely reccommend eating breakfast or lunch or dinner overlooking the sea :)

I definitely do not recommend eating so much that your tummy hurts to touch.. Even if the is a dessert trolley and they let you choose a selection of desserts, even if they do include several variations of dark chocolately tart, mousse and cakes, even if just looking at said desserts makes your mouth open slightly and little bit of drool escapes Homer Simpson style..

JUST SAY NO!

And definitely say no to after dinner cocktails. Your tummy will just hurt even more

I think it can safely be said that I am a greedy little pig.

Even suegra was shocked at my big faaat belly when I got back yesterday.. Not a good sign is it!

Yay!

Success!

I have managed to convince Loco to book a very nice and very expensive hotel for the weekend on the Costa Brava, we even have a jacuzzi in our room :)

Happy Days!

I also saw a real life wild parrot this morning

See you on Tuesday!

ho hum

I have neglected this blog a bit of late.. but I don't really know what to write about..

I haven't done anything particularly interesting, got particularly drunk, or learnt any particularly interesting new facts.

Maybe I've lost my mojo. Maybe I need to get a life..

I think I will drag Loco on an adventure this weekend.. after all, it will be our one year anniversary :)

What a lot of things have happened in a year! As one friend put it

"I'm really happy for you S, that you've found someone you really like, you were always so allergic to commitment.."

I was allergic, wasn't I. Well now I think my allergy is well and truly cured.

attttcccccccccccccccccccccccchhhhhhhhhhhhiooooooo

or is it ;)

Stupid things I have done this week

After getting home from the communion around 0030, I was a little bit tiddly but mostly aware of what I was doing, but have no other real explanation as to why I decided to store my handbag in the top of my wardrobe among my clothes.

I did remember that I had done this the following day and so retrieved my bag to get my phone and make plans for the rest of the day. Just as it was time to leave I checked my bag and noticed that my purse was missing. Cue frantic searching of bag, room, house, car, room, bag, house.. phone calls to those present at the communion were made, and off Loco and I headed to check the restaurant and surrounding streets. We also visited two local police stations but with no joy. I had no choice but to start cancelling my cards.. and continue with the days plans which included helping a friend move house.

On our arrival home Loco sat down on the bed, lifted up some item of clothing that had been carelessly thrown there in the mad frantic search for the purse and let out a gasp. There was my purse.

Obviously my first reaction was to accuse him of having hidden it the whole time.. but this was not the case and it must've been caught up in some item of clothing from the top bit of the wardrobe where I had stored my bag..

This was not the only stupid thing I would do this week..

Loco's mother damaged her muscle while out on her daily walk and so was using one of those heat relieiving muscle rubs which comes in a red and white tube, just like toothpaste...

Yes you've guessed it, when I go to brush my teeth, I see the familiar red and white tube on the side, squeeze the white paste on my toothbrush and start brushing away. But hang on a minute, this isn't the familiar minty freshness I normal associate with toothpaste. I check the tube and realise my mistake. I start spitting the remaining paste out but I had already given it a could bruch around my mouth so it wasn't as easy as it sounds, coupled with a burning sensation all around my mouth where I had rubbed it in my panic to get it out of my mouth.

I spent the next few days sporting some very sore, split lips from where the cream had burnt them.

To top off my week I managed to fall over at work. One second I was wiggling along, the next I am flat on my knees sliding along the parquet like some bizarre knee sliding person...

Oh fool am I.

News

OK so I know I've been AWOL for a couple of weeks but I had important things to attend to - Shameless has a new job :)

I kept that one quiet didn't I!

I've been in my current position for 2 and a half years and I decided that I needed a change. So I am changing industries, departments and job title. Hope I will like the new place :)

It's by the beach so it can't be bad. Stroll out of work and into sea, I'm picturing it now :)
Also I get to buy more officey type clothes - any excuse to buy clothes makes me happy.
I found a nice dress for the communion by the way, but I didn't wear it - it rained and it didn't seem suitable :(

However there are some issues that I'm not so sure about -

Will blog be accesible from new job? What about hotmail?

I didn't ask in the interview - probably for the best - and now I'll have to wait and see.

Am hoping my posts will be more frequent now! Last couple of weeks have been quite stressful..

What have I missed in my absence?

The Shameless Hulk

Loco often asks me why, when I go out with him, I don't get totally wrecked like I used to.

The reasons are two-fold:

1) My kidneys and liver are undoubtedly pickled beyond all possible belief and could probably do with a damn good rest. (read they never want to see a lick of alcohol ever ever again)

2) Drinking when single and drinking when coupled produce a jekyll and hyde effect in this little shameless one. Loco didn't realise this, but he sure as hell does now.

Shameless when single: Can drink even the most hardcore Russian under the table. Flaming sambucas, crazy mexicans, 7 day drinking binges, you name it, I've done it. The life and soul of a very drunken party - yeh that's me.

Shameless when coupled: Tends to limit her intake of alcohol to perhaps a maximum of half a bottle of wine or 2 cocktails. Alcohol makes her paranoid, angry and, on occaisions violent. A work party with Loco ended in near disaster when one of Loco's work colleagues told her

"You better watch your boyfriend or he'll be off"

This made Shameless very angry indeed and she spent the rest of the night shooting evil looks and snide comments in said work colleague's general direction and getting mroe drunk. Loco then decided to accuse Shameless of flirting with his work colleague (she wasn't, she was just stopping him from falling asleep as he was very drunk). Shameless started raging and stormed off, barging past people who got very cross with angry, barging girl and shouted at her, which she didn't like at all either, so she told them, in no uncertain terms, to "FUCK OFF".

She then happened to bump into an old fling - no names mentioned - and had a short chat unaware that Loco was watching her and old fling from the stairs. As old fling walked down the stairs he began to say something about Shameless to his friend in front of Loco.. the words remains a mystery.. as Loco says that he did not understand, yet is continuing to sulk about it so he must've understood something.

Loco and Shameless then decided to call it a night and tried to find the car.. which they couldn't.. and Shameless cried on a street corner because her very high, but very beautiful, shoes hurt her and leery drunken men leered at her while Loco had dissappeared off to find the car. Loco then sulked all of Saturday about Shameless' supposed flirting with work colleague and drunken chat with old fling. This morning Loco decided to point out to Shameless all the photos where she appears in the same frame as work colleague. Boys. Grrr.

And this is why I don't get wrecked with Loco.

+ =

Girl Stuff

Migraines + sickness + visiting friends + locos visiting family + bank holidays + day trips + poker on the playstation = lack of blog entries.

I hate migraines, they're such a waste of a day. Especially a weekend day.

I keep thinking summer has arrived but then suddenly black clouds appear and it pours with rain all day ruining bank holiday beach plans .. BOO.

I have to go to a communion soon. Loco's mum says I should buy a new dress. I haven't been to many communions (read none) so I'm not sure what it appropriate attire. I quite like:

But it is suitable for a communion.

Ditto:
Hmm.. what's a girl to do?

The language of love

Loco's English is coming along quite well. He took lessons a few months ago but then for work-related reasons had to stop. We often practice in the car and have been able to hold conversations of up to an hour!

I am extremely anti-dubbing so on every possible occaision we watch films in their original language - normally English, this also helps Loco with his English although he is inclined to prefer gory, violent films whereas I like romantic comedies, however it helps his vocabulary but he tends to learn words like mofo, shut the fuck up, and randomly fuck my arse (!?). But his personal favourite has to be "I love you honey bunny" (pulp fiction) which he says to me sometimes, and in his own special way, it becomes, "I love you honey pig" as he didn't think a rabbit was fitting to describe me and my tummy. Lovely, just lovely.

The guilt rose

Today it is St George's day (known as San Jordi in Catalunya). Here in Barcelona you can find the streets lined with book stalls and rose sellers, for it is tradition that girls should receive a rose and boys a book. I would presonally prefer a book but Loco has just passed by to surprise me by bringing me a red rose :) or a guilt rose in his case.

Loco has good reason to feel guilty, this weekend it was my birthday and Loco decided that he didn't feel like buying me a present. He told me from the outset that he hadn't bought me a present but I thought he was lying so that he could surprise me later in the day, at lunch? (no), in the afternoon? (no), in the evening perhaps? (no), a fancy dinner? (no), bedtime then? (no and no). Loco had in fact told the truth - he hadn't bought me a present - after all I'd said it didn't matter some time ago - I don't remember those words coming from my mouth..

I was very sad that Loco hadn't got me a present, or even a card, and from my wailing and sobbing I think Loco realises that he made a grave error in judgement on this occasion; Hence the guilt rose. It's a step, but he still has a long way to go. Didn't the boy learn on Valentine's day?

The Dentist

Unlike in the UK, in Spain dentistry is not covered by the healthcare system. Not that in UK it makes any difference, I found it virtually impossible to get a dentist and ended up travelling for over an hour everytime I needed anything done.

My teeth are crappy, to put it lightly, at the tender age of 24 I have had two root canals resulting in the loss of one tooth and a gold crown on the other. On both occasions I cried for days, especially after being gypsyfied. Normally people don't notice (I hope). Loco only noticed the offending article 3 days ago. Suegra was also shocked by this news, in Spain they don't use gold crowns anymore :( If only I'd known that when I'd had it done. When asked what I would like for my birthday, I often reply "Tooth implant" but as yet have had no luck..

For a few weeks I have noted the all too familiar sensation that goes along with the need for a filling but have ignored it on the basis that it was probably all in my head due to reading so many tooth stories on other people's blogs, however the sensations persisted and I decided that it was probably time to bite the bullet and head to the dentist.

I took the last day of my holiday to go to the dentist, Suegra took me, I think she has adopted me as her own. Luckily it looks like no root canals, but 6 fillings need redoing to the tune of 300 Euros.

Ouch.

I now have 6 visits to the dentist to look forward to :( I hate the dentist. Just waiting for the examination gave me butterflies in my legs. Let's hope they don't find any nasty surprises as I don't think I could face root canal ever again..

In happier news check this out