Ring Ring

Ha! Loco proposed! We're getting married! Yippeeeeeeeeeeee

2009 Update

Hello. I am alive. So as you can pretty much tell - I jumped ship on my blog. This was for various reasons really, I thought people would have become bored of reading about tiles, parquet and taps which was pretty much my life for about a year and also I felt kind of, not guilty but a little bit guilty having this blog and Loco not knowing anything about it ... and now ..

I still have that weird guilt thing going on but as I occasionally check my emails and see that there are people who still read this and write me stuff I though what the hell, and decided to pop by and give an update on my mundane existence :P

So, Loco and I moved into the beautifully decorated love nest last Autumn after nearly everything was finished to my satisfaction. We had many many more "disgustos" (unpleasant surprises) with regards to the builders and everything but I won't go into that.. trust me.. it's dull. And the neighbours still hate me but who gives a toss about that, a couple of awkward silences in the lift each month - I can take it.

No rings, no proposals, instead I get whingeing about how there's no cash to buy a ring but appear a brand new plasma tv, an imac, a camera, a PS3 etcetcetc. I'm not even going to go there

What else - oh! I bumped into Mr C a couple of weeks ago - when I say bump I mean I was wandering around the reception of the local health center looking confused and disheveled when I heard my name being called. I turned around and it was him. Years of living around the corner from him and the day I am looking like absolute shite I bump into him - sod's law. He told me he'd often thought about calling me but his gf had made him delete all girl's phone numbers from his phone. He is still living with mummy and daddy, having recently broken up with his long term gf who didn't want to become a baby machine within 3 months of meeting him either. He is now on the hunt to find another vessel for his future children and insisted we swapped numbers so that we could meet for coffee - I told him it wasn't one of his best ideas and he had to agree. He also felt the need to inform me several times the reasons for our breakup - mainly because I didn't have any clear ideas about my future. Whatever. While we were conversing I fretted about my one of suegra's cronies seeing me and reporting back about how I been seen talking to a boy who wasn't Loco so when I got home I confessed all only to be given the Spanish Inquisition - where does he live? who are his parents? what's his name? how old is he? etcetctec. Um. Hello? This is a guy I dated 4 years ago for about a week.

Anyway, that's it for now.

Here's Johnny

So here I am back from my unannounced blogging hiatus with good news

• My headaches have all but dissappeared thanks to a new super pillow that moulds to your head. I heart the new pillow, everyone should get one.
• My uterus looks fine and in good working order. Always good to know.
• The apartment is nearly nearly nearly finished - the painters are painting it right now and the furniture arrives in June ready so we can move in. YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY.
• Stomach is feeling better - just need to go and collect some test results to see what the actual cause of the trouble is.
• It was my birthday and I got lots of lovely presents including 26 roses from Loco - surprise delivered to my work! He has outdone himself this year.
• I have the rest of the week off work to hang out with my friends who are visiting

I even have a new word for you, but I'll save that for mañana.

Ayyyy

I know have I have been particularly slack in my efforts to teach the world how to cuss in Spanish but I have good reason which I will summarise here

• Week long headaches
• Stomach ulcer
• Two vists to the gynaecologist in a week. TWO
• MORE problems with the apartment including lawyers and surveyors
• Family visits

So all in all, meeeehhhhhhhh or as they would say here

Dun dun duh

Word of the Week
helping the world cuss in Spanish

¡La Virgen!

The Virgin!

EG: after recounting my woes to a Spanish person they may reply

!Ay la Virgen! Pobrecita

Oh The Virgin, poor little one

Things are now looking up though – more soon to come!

Alive

Loco injured himself at football for the second time in 3 weeks. he is now hobbling around on crutches which means that I will remain alive for the foreseeable future - no skiing ya see! YAY!

It is just as well really, seeing as I spent the month's wages (his and mine) on duvet covers. Champagne tastes, beer money. sigh.

Oh and the chapuceros from last week - they got sacked. The building work has been delayed while the kitchen is taken out, the walls re-tiled, the plastering redone and the ceiling being re-put up, at no cost to ourselves thank God.

Anyway now it's time for, dun dun duhhhhhhhhh

Word of the Week
helping the world cuss in Spanish

This week's word is TORPE meaning Clumsy, slow or awkward

EG: Loco: "Cuidado con mi pie!" Watch my foot!

Shameless trips over Loco's foot

Loco: "Que torpe eres, por dios" My God you are clumsy

Pleasing to the ear

This version of this song, pleases me.

Do wah diddy diddy

Murray Lachlan Young

New event

There's a few days left before I go to my death skiing, so I thought I'd introduce a new event on the blog

Shameless Hussy Productions is proud to present

...Sound trumpets...

Word of the Week
helping the world cuss in Spanish

Good eh!

So today's word, although not necessarily a "taco" (swearword), it can come in quite handy. So without any further ado, let me present today's word

CHAPUCERO

pronounced cha-poo-thero

Translation: Shoddy workmanship, "cowboy"

Example sentence: Menudo chapucero! no veas como me han jodido la cocina

Translation: God damn cowboy! You won't believe how they have fucked up my kitchen

In my case I am talking about the chapuceros that installed the gas tubing, who after seeing a nice new kitchen decided to sit on the new cupboards, bending the doors, throwing cigarette butts on the nice new floor, and drilling holes in the tiles, THE GOD DAMN TILES, to poke through some pipes anywhere they saw fit, only to cover up the pipes with a box of what looks like scrap metal. AND IT ISN'T EVEN STRAIGHT.

I promise I will get round to taking photos some day.

Skimite

Don't think I have forgotten last year's debacle.

I haven't.

I well remember the incident with the small child, and the way it bled, practically to death on a frosty bed of snow.

I also remember the near-death experience on the journey there, with the crazy drivers and the slippery roads.

I remember it all, and none too fondly.

So why, WHY on earth are we going again.

Skiing. sigh. It's a bit like marmite.