The Shameless Hulk

Loco often asks me why, when I go out with him, I don't get totally wrecked like I used to.

The reasons are two-fold:

1) My kidneys and liver are undoubtedly pickled beyond all possible belief and could probably do with a damn good rest. (read they never want to see a lick of alcohol ever ever again)

2) Drinking when single and drinking when coupled produce a jekyll and hyde effect in this little shameless one. Loco didn't realise this, but he sure as hell does now.

Shameless when single: Can drink even the most hardcore Russian under the table. Flaming sambucas, crazy mexicans, 7 day drinking binges, you name it, I've done it. The life and soul of a very drunken party - yeh that's me.

Shameless when coupled: Tends to limit her intake of alcohol to perhaps a maximum of half a bottle of wine or 2 cocktails. Alcohol makes her paranoid, angry and, on occaisions violent. A work party with Loco ended in near disaster when one of Loco's work colleagues told her

"You better watch your boyfriend or he'll be off"

This made Shameless very angry indeed and she spent the rest of the night shooting evil looks and snide comments in said work colleague's general direction and getting mroe drunk. Loco then decided to accuse Shameless of flirting with his work colleague (she wasn't, she was just stopping him from falling asleep as he was very drunk). Shameless started raging and stormed off, barging past people who got very cross with angry, barging girl and shouted at her, which she didn't like at all either, so she told them, in no uncertain terms, to "FUCK OFF".

She then happened to bump into an old fling - no names mentioned - and had a short chat unaware that Loco was watching her and old fling from the stairs. As old fling walked down the stairs he began to say something about Shameless to his friend in front of Loco.. the words remains a mystery.. as Loco says that he did not understand, yet is continuing to sulk about it so he must've understood something.

Loco and Shameless then decided to call it a night and tried to find the car.. which they couldn't.. and Shameless cried on a street corner because her very high, but very beautiful, shoes hurt her and leery drunken men leered at her while Loco had dissappeared off to find the car. Loco then sulked all of Saturday about Shameless' supposed flirting with work colleague and drunken chat with old fling. This morning Loco decided to point out to Shameless all the photos where she appears in the same frame as work colleague. Boys. Grrr.

And this is why I don't get wrecked with Loco.

+ =