I don't smoke da reefer

So HC's brother has arrived. Rafa - not 20 but 24. Loco of course thinks that I fancy him. I don't.

He arrived accompanied by his mother and then proceeded to sulk in his room for 2 entire days.

He comes out occasionally now and seems to have taken a shine to Loco. Perhaps this is because Loco knows where he can purchase his favourite grocery item. Hash. Rafa's brother was always, is always very anti drugs, but now I have to make do with his little pothead of a brother who has possibly the most annoying voice ever.

Happy Days.

Meeting the parents

So .. I've met the parents! and the brother and sister in law! And they're all so nice! It was Loco's father's birthday and we went out for lunch. I sat next Loco's brother and opposite Loco, which suited me fine.

His sister-in-law seems a little peculiar but she is very Catalan so I'll let it slide for now.

Now, in Spain, meeting the parents is a very big deal. HUGE. Meeting the parents means that you are in a very serious relationship with probable intentions to marry. In our case, Loco had to give some explanation as to why he slept in Barcelona every night at a "friend's place" and after much prompting from his mother about whether his friend happened to be a girl, that perhaps was a "special friend" Loco finally admitted it and his father was not surprised exclaiming "Tiran más dos tetas que dos carretas" roughly translated as a pair of breasts pull more than a pair of carts. And so a short time later I was invited for lunch.

Normally you get introduced to the parents after 6 months to a year. I know people who have been dating over a year and still haven't met the parents, nor do the parents even know of the significant others existence. (This was the case with my ex in Madrid).

I think Loco's mother was pleasantly surprised as from what I gather she was expecting the stereotypical British person as found on the likes of Ibiza Uncovered and Benidorm Hen Nights. She seems satisfied that I am not some sort of Shameless Hussy (if only she knew, bwa ha ha ha).

So now they know. And now I only have to meet the rest of the 256 family members who will soon know about me as apparently Loco's mother is not one to keep her mouth closed. Joy.

eeeek

Last night Loco and I went for dinner at a Japanese. It wasn't bad, they have a range of menus at reasonable prices (calle Provenca between Balmes and Enric Granados - don't recall the name)

Anyway, I don't know if it was something they put in the food, or the free shot of Sake afterwards but when I got home I could not stop laughing.

Even when we got amorous, every little while I kept getting filled with an urge to laugh. Not exactly romantic!

I have a new addiction. Well I have two new addictions

1. Singstar - The funnest PS game in the world ever?? Loco and I have become quite competitive and over the last few days and my housemates have arrived home quite often to find us singing away like crazies.

2. Eyetoy - My brother has told me it is cheesy. Who cares? I love cheese. There are so many wondrous games for this small but perfect contraption that I wonder if I will ever leave the house again. I spent the weekend fighting virtual foes and absolutely knackered myself out. My arms hurt :(

Everyone should invest.

RIP Steve

I was very sad to hear of the death of Steve Irwin - The Legendary Crocodile (funnily enough spelt cocodrilo in Spanish) Hunter.

His shows never failed to amuse me and I even went to see the movie..

A sad loss.

So today I decided that I would like to visit the doctor.

I was surprised, being in this technologically not advanced country, that they had a nifty little system whereby you go online, type in your medical card number and pick an appointment day and time. Surprised that is, until I found the next available appointment is in 3 to 4 weeks. Only in Spain.

I have already been given a bollocking by the doc for turning up without an appointment (i.e. emergency) (I had had swollen tonsils for a week), what should I do, wait a month, stay at home watching repeats of House, Lost and Desperate Housewives until they can fit me in. Hmm doesn't sound so bad when it's put like that.

Anyway I have decided now that I'm in lurve, I should probably get the "tests". Hopefully everything will be hunky dory but you never know and they're always bleating on about the percentage of people with Chlamydia who don't know etc so best to be safe than sorry.

Last night laying in bed with Loco I had the realisation that I am 100% totally and utterly head over heels in love with him... So in love the thought of being with him in a year doesn't scare me, the thought of being him in ten years doesn't scare me, in fact being with him and only him forever and ever doesn't scare me.. This is out of control.

And then, I told him. And even more amazingly he (says he) feels the same. We even talked about moving in together. Seriously!

I guess it's weird, I've become so used to living my own life and doing my own thing that this, happening so suddenly, is a shock.

I don't really believe in "The one", but if I did, I think Loco might just be it :)

Feeling the way I do also means that I want to be totally honest with him about everything but I don't want him to know the details of my sordid past, especially as I know he's only be with one other person. Will he think less of me because of it or will he respect my honesty??

Such a dilemma.

Loco's village festival

Last night I went with Loco to his village festival.

Spaniards (especially those in Cacalunya) amaze me with their obsession with fireworks. Every major or even minor festival here involves, at some point or another, the throwing of fireworks, normally at other people. This one was no exception and lo and behold, upon arriving, we encountered devils dancing around with lit fireworks. Not to want to sound like a spoilsport or a pussy but I hate it! It's clearly dangerous and could burn someone!

Anyway we went and sat in one of the make shift bars and got ourselves a drink. I was feeling a little bit strange because Loco's family and friends not to mention the ex, were somewhere around and we cuold bump into them at any moment so it was a little bit nerve racking. In the end he did hold my hand and give me kisses and even searched (unsuccessfuly) for his brother to introduce me but I think this is because he knew his parents would not be there.

BUT - He has told his mother about me :)

We carried on strolling around the fair and went on one of the rides, kind of like a dangerous Spanish version of a waltzer, and then, then I saw Mr C's brother. Yes, as I think I may have mentioned previously, Loco is from the same village as Mr C and there, right in front of me was his brother, and his sister... and Mr C. I gasped and continued to walk as Loco asked me what was wrong. So I told him that I'd seen Mr C and we carried on walking.

We next went to look at the stalls and to quote Loco, my eyes were bulging out of my head when I saw Mr C and his family trooping towards me once more. This time I tried to make eye contact, but was unsuccessful in my endeavours. Loco says his face rings a bell. Well that doesn't surprise me as they live 2 streets away from each other. He also gave me grief for a while with the old "he's a good looking chap" chestnut, "I'm not as good looking as he is".

"Oh be quiet" I told him, "Yes he is good looking but I can't think of one thing that he has that I prefer to you" or something along those lines..

I had also arranged to meet my cousin as it is also Rat Steinberger's village but she never called.. quel surprise!

You can't choose your family!

Today Head Chicken came back from yet another holiday to the exotic laden with giant buddhas and the like.

I would imagine that after a 13 hour flight all I would want to do is rest, but no, I woke up bleary eyed and stumbled down to the kitchen to grab a bitr, maybe some juice to find - shock horror - him and her cleaning but not just cleaning. Taking everything out of the cupboards and cleaning EVERYTHING from top to bottom cleaning. Even Lily had been roped in.

This could only mean one thing. his mother is coming.

On the 4th September she will arrive to a pristine apartment with HC's brother who will soon be the newest occupant.

In a way this pleases me as it means no more HC but I am not sure I am prepared for the delights of living with a 20 year old boy.

I have good news. I have given up smoking and I drink less! Tick and Tick on the New Year's Resolution's boxes.

Reading back through the archive, it is worrying how much I was drinking and partying last year. Although it made for amusing tales and I had a whole lot of fun, it wasn't healthy for my body or mind so am pleased to be a changed (ish) person.

Although this weekend when J was here I still managed my fair share of multi coloured flaming shots until I was lighting vodka in J's mouth and tipping litres of water over his head in the comfort of my kitchen.

I was asked to write the following for work so I thought I would share it

What do you like about Barcelona?

There are so many things I like about Barcelona it would take me all day to list them all. Summer days on the beach with a clara in hand, lounging in front of one of the chiringuitos playing the latest summer tunes. Winter weekends up in the snow of the nearby Pyrenees. Sitting outside on one of the hundreds of terraces around the city watching the world go by and listening to the people chattering in every different language; The city is so cosmopolitan, it’s been easy to make friends from all over the world.

On a sunny day it’s great to spend time at the beach, then later when the sun has set head up the Tibidabo followed by a night of dancing in Danzatoria, one of my favourite locations, an old villa transformed into a stunning restaurant and nightclub where you can and take in the amazing views of Barcelona by night from the terraces.

For me, Barcelona has everything you could ever want from a city. Great climate, beaches, mountains, culture, fantastic nightlife, anyone of any age, at any time of year can have an amazing experience here, it’s impossible to ever get bored!

Naughty naughty

I have been very, very, very bad.

All I will say is that it involves the very handsome, blue eyed, Andalucian housemate with the sexy accent of my dance teacher.

It won't happen again.

a note

Oh. My. God.

Loco – in bed – aaaaaaamazing.

That's all

A first date

Me and Loco had a date :)

And it went very well! I wasn't even meant to be around this weekend. I had a weekend away planned with some friends on the Costa Brava but as fate would have it on Friday night I started feeling pretty shitty, so popped a couple of ibuprofens and was in bed by 9.

Just as I am going to sleep I get a peculiar txt from Garrulo Then I get a bizarre phonecall from Garrulo asking me to go away with him for the weekend..(after interrogating me about the text message I accidentally sent him the other day)

I tell him that
a) I feel ill
) I already have plans

Yet he still persists and says that he wants to go away with me for the weekend to sort things out and spend some time with me etc etc and so I tell him that if, when I have to get up, at 7am, I still feel ill and am not up to the moutain biking weekend I will call him and we can do something relaxing.

Fast forward to 7am, I feel like shit and decide mountain biking is not for me but that I will call Garrulo and see what happens (I don't call him at 7, I wait a while) but lo and behold is phone is switched off, so I send him a text. I then go back to sleep for the rest of the day.

Surprise, surprise I hear nothing, nada, zip from garrulo (fucker) and so when I get a text from Loco asking if I fancied going out for a drink, I decided that I would go (despite being on my death bed). Dates don't come round every day in these parts.

Well, we went and sampled some mojitos in some of Barcelona's finest mojito bars, there was a some flirting and after having sampled several mojitos in several bars, there was a first kiss. And a very nice first kiss it was too, so nice in fact that it lasted 2 days. No sex mind. Just kissing. and talking. and more kissing. I think cupid's arrow may have struck!

PS. I still haven't heard from Garrulo

Where the men are at

So after the whole Worm fiasco, last night I went to see the Chili Peppers and I got to the front row!!

I can't say that I am really a Chili Peppers fan but I thought I would go to see what all the fuss was about and I'll tell you one thing - Now I know where all Barcelona's fit men are! Well I don't - where do they hide when there is no chili peppers concert?? All I know is that fit men in Barcelona exist, which is an important discovery I'm sure you'll agree.

So the concert was good - very hot- and when I came out I could literally wring out my t-shirt. Lurvely. And for all the fit men that there were I didn't even get a number :(

Ah well.

Technology. grr.

Today I accidently texted Garrulo when I meant to send the text to Loco. They have the same (non-blog) name.

Don't you hate it when that happens!


I have really got myself into some situations by doing that in the past. I remember one time when my ex did something to really piss me off, so I sent my friend a text raging about it. But I didn't send my friend the text did I. No, I sent it to my ex, who I then had to immediately phone and beg not to open the text, which bless his heart, he didn't and he let me delete it straight from his phone.
Well anyway, Garrulo hasn't replied.

waaaaa!

Last night we went to see Sergio Contreras - what a legend - he had dancers with silk scraves, break dancers spinning on their heads, gyrating hips and audience participation. Excellent.

Loco and Intercambio came along with Gracey, Lily and me although we lost them in the crowds.

Head Chicken also went. This is because he heard me listening to the CD and asked me about the artist whereby I happened to mention he would be playing in concert that very evening, so he went, and then told me it was the worst concert he had ever been to because it was very hot (true) and there were lots of garrulos (gypsies) (also true but amusing).

After the concert I had a dilemma. Worm was arriving and I had arranged to meet him and go with some other friends to Danzatoria but I didn't want Loco to see me with him (I have a crush) and so Lily (clever girl) dragged them off for food while I went to meet up with Worm.

I already knew before Worm came back that I didn't like him anymore. I don't know if it was because I had met Loco or some sixth sense type thing but I wasn't really relishing the idea of seeing him.

Worrying about how I was going to keep Loco and Worm separate for the night stopped me from enjoying the concert as much as I should have, and rightly so, as the night turned out to be a high stress disaster.

However, as much Lily tried, Loco and his mate still decided to come to Danzatoria, bad. Me, awkward, Loco, quiet as a mouse, Worm, bemused. It was all very stressful and at one point I was convinced that Chantelle had got it on with Loco especially as after I had said my goodbyes and gone to another club with Worm, Chantelle appeared with Loco. This really made me mad and so I decided if she and he would do that, then I would take Worm home. Which I did.

How I regret it.. I know all guys sometimes have issues etc.. but why do I choose the ones who always do. Yes, erectile disfunction - plus the fact I didn't really want to. What a mess. In the end we just ended up sleeping.

Then as a typical German, Worm decided to get up and go to the bathroom. Naked. And who should see him but intercambio, Loco's mate.

Looks like I can say goodbye to anything happening with Loco.

I spent the rest of the weekend reluctantly hanging out with Worm. I couldn't very well leave him on his own for the weekend. On Monday he had a job interview, he was then offered the job. He expects me to be delighted, which obviously I am not.

Woe is me.

Randomly my housemate Lily bumped into Loco in the street!

She took the initiative of acquring his phone number! Good girl!

I have now texted him and invited him to the concert...

Only problem is fucking Worm is coming this weekend.

Watch this space..

Why?

It’s that time again when I have to go out with my cousin in Sabadell. I am still not drinking so even though the cheese emporiums amuse me when drunk I am not sure whether they will hold the same enchantment when sober.

I am right. They are not nearly as much fun sober and when there is no alcohol to numb your high heeled feet they really hurt. And you get very tired.

I did, however, discover another disco named Malatsefestas, which has a great big BAYWATCH sign across the bar. It also has the obligatory semi-naked dancing barmaids and bar men and today a special treat – a fake tan demonstration that cuts short the music and has a woman spraying people with fake tan on the stage. Bizarre.

I became very tired far earlier than the first train is due to leave and so spend some time chatting with my cousin who has bought an apartment with Rat Steinberger. FOOL FOOL. I am aghast at this news. She is so young to be making such a commitment with such an idiot.

My favourite comments from the conversation.

(They only ever see each other at weekends) When we live together then we’ll really know whether we make a good couple or not besides we’ve already spent 2 weeks together on holiday.

AGGH! You should know that before you move in with someone.

Rat wants us to have children within 2 years

AGGH! Children? At 24? Are you mad woman?

I can take no more of this crazy speak and decide to go and wait on the cold platform for the train. As I am waiting a fight breaks out on the other side of the wall and young blokes run in and out of the station.. fascinating. The train pulls in and I decide to ask the chap sitting next to me what happened. He doesn’t appear to know but uses it as an opportunity to chat to me all the way home. He is a catalan musician who plays the sax (I think). He isn’t handsome and he reeks of beer. As soon as we reach my stop I run away as fast as I can.

On Saturday my housemate has been invited to a party by her intercambio and I decided to invite myself and Chuck decided to invite himself to wherever I was going. So the 3 of us went to meet Intercambio to go to this party. But first stop by a chupito bar (me still not drinking) I watch as the others down flaming idunnowhats and we then headed to the party. It was a skate party and so, not really my thing. I stood at started to chat with Intercambio’s mate who I shall call Loco. He seemed like a quiet little thing but the more I spoke to him, the more I thought, Hey – this is my kind of guy. We ended up ditching the party and going to another party in a swanky bar across town which was also dull. So we decided upon Arena – a big gay club in the center of Barcelona but where you normally tend to find more straight, leery pervs than actual gay men but it’s fun. By this point I was really quite fancying Loco and we had already started having little in jokes.. Besides intercambio and housemate were getting it on.

But besides that, I really liked him. I thought he was cute, funny and a little bit crazy J But I wasn’t particularly enamoured with his typical Catalan hairstyle i.e. the mullet.

I asked him if he wanted to come to a concert next week and he said he did.. :)

We all went for breakfast later and I ended up getting home at around 0830, I was so tired by this point and had fallen asleep at breakfast! So tired in fact that I forgot to give Loco my number or get his ... I now must find some way of acquiring it ..

I spend my Sunday drinking fruit juice on the beach front and going to the movies.

I watch Inside Man. It entertained me. I give it 7/10